I read this post, and while I don't agree with all of her thesis statement, I am fine with her overall premise. Well worth reading. I don't often listen to women tell me anything about men, any more than women seek me out for fashion advice, but considering who she is married to, it has appeared to have rubbed off on her. My wife has been forever transformed by her association with me, so I can relate.
The title above of this post was deliberate. 'Parent' not 'Dad'. Mrs du Toit wrote a line that jumped out at me, involving sociopaths. I R one, so I thought about that, and it troubled my fingers enough to scrawl out this missive.
Sociopathic mothers kill their kids. The fathers protect them at all costs. You have never heard a story of a guy killing his child so he could go to the prom. It really is that simple.
Too many people confuse 'sociopath' with 'psychotic'. An easy mistake to make, but wildly inaccurate. Hannibal Lecter and Napoleon are probably history's perfect examples of the far end of sociopathology. Hitler and Nero are perfect examples of psychotics. Reason and a lack of conscience vs ego and a desire to inflict pain.
At some point every sociopath chooses which path they will take, which side they will serve, if you will. Psychopaths merely serve their own twisted desires, and appetites. And yes, I'll admit that each side of this twisted coin can come perilously close to one extreme or the other. BUT! You can tame a psychopath with medication. A bound sociopath will bite your tongue out while in restraints, swallow it, and his pulse will not show any variation.
Enough of that, now, to raising children. We'll leave out psychopaths, who should be shot down like rabid dogs...
I am living proof that you can be a sociopath and parent effectively. There was a stiff learning curve, and my first batch of kids suffered for it. Some. I regret that, and have tried to make amends. It is hard enough trying to make amends and explanations here, imagine dealing with an adult child who is crying as you try to speak with them.
And before you ask, I have no idea idea if my 'condition' is genetic. Doesn't seem to be. So far. It is either an accident of nature, or one of God's plans, to seed predators amongst the population of the greatest predators this world has ever seen: Humanity.
Doubt me? Okay, show me a recent photograph of a Saber Tooth Tiger. Is there any non-human predator on the face of our (yes, our) planet that is not classified as endangered? I rest my case.
Anyway, I'm getting bored with this. I'll be happy to answer any of your questions after the class.