Most of you are too young to remember the old theatres, where the screens were as large as a football field, and ashtrays were built into the arms of the seats.
Where you could go to the snack bar and buy a couple of Mustard Missiles from a pretty girl who smiled and called you sir, and seemed just darned happy to be there, by shucks, and then you carted your two huge dogs over to the condiment center, and slathered them with mustard and relish and sometimes, ketchup, from open bin-type containers, using metal scoops...
And then the condiments became packets, and then...they were gone. Oh, some place might still have dogs, but you look at the price, and say 'fuck that, I can buy a steak and a martini after the movie for that much...'
When did popcorn start coming out of big plastic garbage bags, to be warmed up in a pseudo-popper? Oh yeah, when disenfranchised teens began burning the shit so they didn't have to make it anymore.
Why don't Mexicans do this job? Shit, I'd sign off on amnesty if I could get my theatre back. Fuck, I'd Zyklon-B any American kid under the age of 25, and start over. Except for mine. Of course.
Two movies for two bucks, with an intermission, fresh popcorn, two delicious hotdogs for under a buck...crikey, the drive-in had pizza, and the best damn barbecue beef sandwich I have ever had to this day...burritos, cigarettes (suck in breath showing your horror) ice cream...the works. The worst pizza I ever got there was better than the best Pizza Hut has to offer today.
And boy, just look at all those white kids workin their asses off. Under the watchful eye of the overseer (the owner) I bet there was 25 kids working at the drive-in, at least. The indoor theatres? Two stories high, three snack bars? Hardly any waiting to be served?
Well, they're all torn down, now. That time, those days are, sadly, gone.
Enjoy the world you've let happen.