Even more so than usual. The wife woke me at eight, to tell me she was leaving for work, and I said goodbye and fell back to sleep, and didn't wake up again until 9:45. I bolted out of bed in a panic to check the kids, and John was laying quietly in the wife's bed, and Nat was just blinking herself awake. Whew.
I fed them, and they are downstairs watching cartoons, and blowing up their Chuck E Cheese balloons and firing them at each other and laughing their asses off. And all I want to do is lay down and stop breathing for about a hundred years.
It's not so much that I'm depressed, it's more like I just don't give a shit. About anything. Anyone. Hardly. Just enervated. I had a cup of coffee, and nothing. I can't even believe I'm writing this. I think I'll go lay down on the couch and keep an ear on the kids while I doze.
After the wife left, I had a dream that I had a friend (it was just a dream, okay?) and I was calling 911 because his horse had rolled on him while he was reenacting a Greek battle between mortals and fantastic creatures of myth, and he was tricked out as a Satyr, and as the horse rolled, he accidentally fired an arrow into his wife's chest, and the 911 operator was trying to sell me rescue plans.
I could get a helicopter for one price, an EMT was extra, but the additional EMT after the first one was half price, and so on. I was screaming at her to just send an ambulance or something but she kept calmly insisting that I give her my insurance information and my credit card number and expiration date.
Then I noted that night was falling, and that the reenactors had apparently conjured their real avatars, and were turning into actual mythological Greek beings and creatures, and were fighting and confronting each other, and dark rifts were opening up and orcs and horned beast men were pouring out of them, armed with swords and spears and whirling slings, and I looked down, and I was naked, but I had a shield and a long, Celtic sword, and I remember looking around and thinking 'Fuck, this house is not a decent defensive position' and then...
I woke up.