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        Wednesday, March 31, 2004

    Just Wait...

    Marines are poised to put some serious hurt on the Iraqi dogs of Fallujah.

    That is their mission...their reason to exist...why they are there.

    When the planets align, when the ducks are in a row, when the chickens have come home to roost, somebody's gonna get a spanking.

    Film will not be seen at eleven. Bullets will fly...Iraqi's will die...buzzards will fly.

    Two weeks, max. Mark this post on your calendar for a revisit. You do not call the Exterminator to catch flies in their hands, take them outside, and let them go.

    The goats are about to be separated from the sheep, and there won't be enough of the goats left to put in shoeboxes, let alone those silly, flag-draped refridgerator crates the stupid ragheads use to parade the corpses of their dead.

    Even now, grim-faced young American boys are cleaning and oiling their guns, and taking note of every face they see on FOX News and Al Jazeera that is dancing, stomping, and mutilating our dead.

    I can't wait.





       

    The Goddess Ann...

    You know what to do...KNEEL!!!





       

    The Definition of 'Dumb Shit'...

    Ouch...

    I would have this idiot found in Ft Marcy Park.





        Sunday, March 28, 2004

    Dammit!

    What's wrong, you scared of his Big Brain?

    Get over there and read and comment and enjoy this blog. We all enjoy the love, no matter how curmudgeonly we act, and I'd hate to see this guy quit, because I really enjoy him.

    Move it!





       

    Good News, Bad News...

    This article both lifted my spirits and loosened my bowels. The part that really got to me is the last two paragraphs...

    Yesterday, ABC News reported federal agents in the largest investigation ever into Internet child pornography discovered a vast underground market that included many people with access to children, such as a campus minister, a seventh-grade teacher, a Boy Scout volunteer, a substitute teacher, a Catholic priest and a Mormon camp counselor.

    Agents arrested a Chicago pediatrician who allegedly had 3,000 images of child pornography stored on his computer.


    If I could get a serious financial sponsor so I could afford to dedicate my life to it, I would hunt people like this down and slaughter them like the inhuman swine they are.

    I promise.





       

    It Is Hard To Get More Messed Up...

    Than this.

    I suggest that if this becomes epidemic, the general public remind the police that they work for us by shooting a bunch of them until they stop this shit.

    This ain't no slippery slope, baby, this is the Constitution in a bloody heap at the bottom with grass stains all over it's butt.

    If you were looking for a 'Sign of the End', you need look no further than this horrible story.

    Update:

    More of this bullshit...





        Saturday, March 27, 2004

    This Guy's Nuts...

    But in a Good Way. He is on my 'try to read every day list', though lately he has fallen prey to the curse of allowing 'Guest Bloggers' to come in and mess up the place.

    Pay special attention to his 'Blogging 101' posts, so you can appreciate the irony with which I write this post.





       

    New (to me) Blog Alert!

    This guys writing shines...go check it out.

    Update:

    I just found out that my link above sucks ass, and I am too busy (lazy) to fix it...so just scroll down to Remember '...or the terrorists win'? and that is the one I was referring to. This is one of the rare blogs where I actually go back and read the archives.





       

    Voxing Their Ears...

    This post of his encapsulates what I've been trying to say (and a lot less wordily than him) for a long time . My favorite quote, and the heart of the post:

    I do not believe that it is my job to educate every ignoramus with an attitude who happens to float by. I am not a teacher.

    A-Frigging-men to that. 'Course, my blog is 'Entertainment Tonight' to Vox's 'Capital Gang' (or maybe Lou Dobb's?), but I really get my fuzzies burned when some fully propagandized dipwit comes out of the gate, with blinders on, and a rope of lies tied around their balls to make them buck. I don't even have eight seconds for that sort of nonsense.

    This post dadoes in nicely with the above. And then you might as well read everything in between, too.

    As happy as I am with my job, it has been tragic that I haven't been able to keep up with this and my other favorite blogs every day.

    Update:

    If your retarded browser won't lock on to the links I have given you, just hit F11 twice, and scroll down manually to "Sometimes it happens to be true" and "How to argue like a liberal", respectively.





        Friday, March 26, 2004

    Work Sucks...

    I am high on good wine, Ibuprofin, and aspirin, and ready to go to sleep like a dead man.

    I networked a 14,000 sq ft building today, and it went off without a hitch...well, I had a Mexican as my assistant...imagine my joy.

    It was cool, though...he turned out to be an American, after all. Those are the ones I like...Americans, that is. You be an Amurrican, and I don't give a shit what kind of sunscreen you use.

    Sadly, while pleasant and personable, he was as dumb as a sack of hammers. I wasted at least three hours fixing stuff he fucked up even after I had showed him how to do it right...several times.

    Kids today...





        Thursday, March 25, 2004

    Do NOT!!!

    Let these little, evil, yellow fucks take the High Ground!

    Go read this book if you have to...either way, those little commie termites need to be sprayed.





       

    Seems I'm Not Alone...

    ...in my hatred for Arab men.





       

    Note The Shithead's Statement...

    ...at the bottom of this article.

    If you don't have a gun, shame on you.





       

    The Epitome Of Confusion...

    ...is this little story.

    I'm pretty sure I won't be stopping to aid any brown people I run over.

    They have only themselves to blame.





        Wednesday, March 24, 2004

    I Pooped...

    I actually tried to sneak out a fart in the kitchen tonight, and began a potentially tragic turtle, and actually sucked it back in!!

    I rock.





       

    The Goddess Ann Speaks!

    Go and worship.

    Comforting? I haven't changed? Just because I'm workin for da man?

    Right now, I'm noshing on the best Dead Chicken I may have ever had. Bringing home extra bacon seems to have endeared me even more so to my wife. Women...

    I only get a chance to hear slips of news during the day, now...unlike the past year, where I could surf the Net for every nuance...I feel like a prisoner, where every so often some other inmate shuffling past me whispers through unmoving lips the latest skinny...

    Ahhh, fukkit, I'm making fat money. That's all that counts, in'it? I may turn out to be the rare weekend blogger, catching up during the weekend while most of the other blogs fall silent.

    I have plenty of juicy thoughts about dead and dying Palistinkians...must.percolate...

    Love you guys...even the ones I hate. TTFN.





        Monday, March 22, 2004

    It Was Good While It Lasted...

    Well, I took a job today...too good to be true, and I couldn't turn it down. It is full time, and I imagine that this will effect my blogging considerably.

    Oh, well.





       

    Oh, This Is A Glorious Day!

    Some of my favorite bits:

    Israeli helicopters fired three missile as Yassin, his bodyguards and dozens of others left a mosque in Gaza City at daybreak Monday. Yassin, a quadriplegic who uses a wheelchair, and seven others were killed, including several bodyguards. Seventeen people were wounded.

    Only a charred metal seat and a twisted wheel were left of his wheelchair and a blood-soaked brown shoe lay in the street. "Two or three people were lying next to him on the ground. One was legless," said taxi driver Yousef Haddad, who had rushed out of a nearby grocery when the missiles shook the Sabra neighborhood.


    It's about damned time somebody nuked that psychotic old cripple. I can only hope he suffered for several minutes as he choked on his own black blood.

    Fuck these bastards. I pray Israel kills every one of them.







        Sunday, March 21, 2004

    The Shadow Government...

    ...is just a preposterous fantasy.

    Right.





       

    Gorillas In The Mist...

    One of my Dear Readers sent me this...

    He then said: Interesting, big black hairy motherfucker escapes from prison, attacks several white women and children, and ends up getting shot to death by cops. In this case it was a gorilla, not a black dude, but hey, what the hell. What's really funny, the paper up here played it up as fucking police brutality. I can't find the article online, but the biggest tragedy of the day, according to them, was the police shooting the damn ape dead instead of using non-lethal force. I don't know about you, but a 340 lb gorilla charging me from less than 20 ft away ain't gonna be stopped with non-lethal force.

    He ends with this:

    Kinda reminds me of Luella and Rowina walking thru the park one day, when another escaped gorilla jumps out of the bushes, grabs Luella, and drags her off. The big ape ravages her senseless in the bushes, then ambles off just steps ahead of the park rangers with their dart guns. Well, the ambulance comes, picks up Luella and checks her out, then sends her home.

    Rowina comes by the house several days later to check on her, and Luella won't answer the door. Rowina bangs on the door, then calls out "Luella, I know it was horrible, but you can tell me, honey, are you hurt?"

    Luella responds, "Hell yes I'm hurt! It's been several days, and he ain't called, he ain't wrote, he ain't come by..."


    I haven't printed his moniker, because I'd hate for thin-skinned pussies to give him shit, but this is good stuff...this is how white people talk when they are not afraid of being overheard and persecuted.





       

    Would You...

    Suck a dick so you could go to South Korea?

    Heck, I wouldn't let you rub off on my leg for first class tickets to anywhere.

    America must be a pretty cool place.





        Saturday, March 20, 2004

    Scroll Down...

    ...and read my Updates...

    Dammit.





       

    If I Didn't Have...

    ...about 10 books I am already in various stages of reading, I would buy this book right now. I still might.

    A quote:

    "Forgetfulness occurs when those who have been long inured to civilized order can no longer remember a time in which they had to wonder whether their crops would grow to maturity without being stolen or their children sold into slavery by a victorious foe....They forget that in time of danger, in the face of the enemy, they must trust and confide in each other, or perish....They forget, in short, that there has ever been a category of human experience called the enemy.

    "That, before 9/11, was what had happened to us. The very concept of the enemy had been banished from our moral and political vocabulary. An enemy was just a friend we hadn't done enough for yet. Or perhaps there had been a misunderstanding, or an oversight on our part -- something that we could correct....

    "Our first task is therefore to try to grasp what the concept of the enemy really means. The enemy is someone who is willing to die in order to kill you. And while it is true that the enemy always hates us for a reason, it is his reason, and not ours."

    Brilliant.





       

    This Is Inneresting...

    Go read this. You may have to register, but you should be already. Just do it, pussy.





       

    This Is Just...

    Bizarre...





       

    New (to me) Blog Alert!

    This guys writing shines...go check it out.

    Update:

    I just found out that my link above sucks ass, and I am too busy (lazy) to fix it...so just scroll down to Remember '...or the terrorists win'? and that is the one I was referring to. This is one of the rare blogs where I actually go back and read the archives.





       

    Angelina Jolie...

    They should not even bother putting her in a movie with any plot or substance. All I can think about is wanting to hump her...the camera focuses on those lips and I miss several lines of dialogue.

    That being said, 'Taking Lives' is a fine movie, though I couldn't tell you half the dialogue. Some little chick engaged me in an animated conversation outside the theatre after, going on about the various plot twists and such and asking me if I'd enjoyed it and since I had to pee and wanted to disengage I told her that I hadn't noticed very much because of Angelina's lips and breasts and she thought that was cute. I honestly think she would have shagged me if I'd asked her to. Weird, since she couldn't have been a day over twenty.
    It was one of the rare movies where I couldn't predict the ending half way through, and write the dialogue as it falls out of their mouths. And, as I told that chick, the ending caught me completely by surprise.

    And why do chicks dig Ethan Hawke? The pot-eared fairy doesn't even have any earlobes. Watching his skinny little ass hump Angelina Jolie was like seeing a rat terrier hunching on the doorman's leg...oops! Sorry.

    Let's jump to television: I told you I was going to watch the premier of 'Wonder Falls' on FOX last week, after watching 'Joan of Arcadia'. 'Joan of Arcadia' is a sweet, virginal story that brings my wife and I genuine joy every week. 'Wonder Falls' is the jealous sister, a painted whore who can't live up to her sisters standards, so she becomes a garish, overly painted imitation.

    That being said, it is a good enough show, and I enjoyed it well enough to watch it again this week. My wife refused. She objected to the gratuitous lesbian subplot, and the outright pagan aspects of the story. It is true that the show is flagrantly trying to copy 'Joan of Arcadia', but without all of that yucky, uncomfortable, judgemental God stuff. 'Wonder Falls' wants all the glory, but doesn't have a clue of what a soul is, or how to get one. It is like Al Franken imagining for even a moment that he can be as good or popular as Rush Limbaugh.

    Otherwise, the season is in reruns, there is no football (other that that vile 'arena' crap which I refuse to watch), so life is hardly worth living. I am off the wagon...well, hanging on to the tailgate and being drug by it, anyway. Go to a specialty liquor store and try to find a beer called 'Skull Splitter'. It's my new favorite.

    Update:

    Ethan Hawke, Cunt, or Big Vagina? You be the judge...:

    I just saw him interviewed on a show where the theme was identity theft (a major theme of his latest movie, 'Taking Lives')...

    They asked him "If you could be anyone you wanted, who would you be?"

    His answer?

    "I would wanna be George Bush...I'd fire all of my Cabinet, and then I'd resign..."

    Another 'Hollywood Colostomy Bag' I shall never watch again. Ever.

    Uh, wait a minute...he is in the remake of the upcoming 'Assault On Precinct 13'...

    Fuck. That is high on my favorites list. Damn. Tough to remain pure, ain't it?







        Friday, March 19, 2004

    Dawn Of The Dead...Spoilers...Warning...

    I called one of my sons today from the parking lot of the theatre...I rhapsodized to him over the movie, and suggested ways for him to sucker his wife into seeing it...

    Then I went back in and saw 'Taking Lives', featuring Angelina Jolie, and her lips...and, Thank You Lord, her breasts...

    The bourbon had worn off, somewhat, and sanity had returned...somewhat...I redialed him frantically from the parking lot...

    "Hey...there's a 'pregnancy scene' you may not want her to see...I really do want grandkids...y'know..."

    "Yeah, Dad...thanks for the warning..."

    "Okay...but don't pussy out on me...this is one of the best movies I've seen in my life...go see it, dude...sneak in some booze, though..."

    "That bad?"

    "No...that fucking good...I mean it, it is the most awesome fucking thing I have seen since 1978...it actually beats the shit out of the original, and I am a HUGE fan of the original..."

    Hey, kiddies...Oscar tends to ignore films like this...it is the directors first effort...it is the most solid, tightly wrapped film I've seen since (maybe) 'Three Days Of The Condor'...

    Go see this movie. Take your friends. Tell your other friends. Spread the word. Quit watching previews NOW!

    I am going to see it again at least once this weekend...maybe twice. I was lucky enough to see it during the first showing in a nearly empty theatre...the second show was full. And they are checking ID's BIG TIME...I saw guys with beards being turned away because they didn't have proof of their date of birth.

    Go...sit down front...do NOT leave when the credits start to roll...

    Trust me.

    Rating: R - pervasive strong horror, violence, gore, language and sexuality

    Pervasive= "All Through It!" Do not kid yourself...ALL through it.

    Update:

    In a 'zombie kind of mood', I was searching around and found this, one of the scariest ones ever, and the precedent for 'fast zombies' everyone is whining about today. The director also made (and wrote) the awesome and very disturbing 'Grave of the Vampire', one of my veryist most favorites of all time, and allowing the awesome William Smith to show his range for maybe the only time in his career he didn't have to take second billing to an orangutang.

    WELL worth the rentals, although 'Garden...' is less than an hour long.





        Thursday, March 18, 2004

    Dawn of the Dead...

    I go to see this movie tomorrow at noon. I expect to have the shit scared right out of me, and then turn around and go right back in...me, I mean, not my shit. Shit does not go back in no matter how hard you try. I'll see it twice in a row, unless it scares me too bad. In which case I'll go see it again Saturday or Sunday. The movie, dipstick...not my shit. Geez, grow up.

    Zombie flics really freak me out. When I went to see the original Dawn of the Dead back in 1979, I was totally unprepared for what I saw. I had bought a coke and some popcorn, and I threw them away untouched when the film ended.

    I was all wired up for '28 Days Later', but it was a real letdown, horror-wise. Tomorrows movie shows real promise. I've seen the first ten minutes of it, and there was more horror in those ten minutes than in the last three so-called 'horror movies' I've been to.

    I'm gonna get a pint of Canadian and sneak it in with me for nerve tonic. I hope some dumb-shit doesn't fuck with me during the movie, cuz my phaser is going to be set to kill, I'll tell you.

    I was sitting in the balcony (remember those?) of a theatre, way back in the seventies, for the premier of 'Children Shouldn't Play With Dead Things'. In those days we had people they called 'ushers'. They worked in theatres to make your experience more enjoyable. They threw people out who were talking, and generally kept order. Sometimes the Studio would send out theme packages along with a new release so that the ushers could decorate the theatre and wear costumes that fit the movies theme. What I did not know, when the flesh eating zombie tapped me on the shoulder and moaned into my startled face, was that zombie masks were the theme for tonight...I punched that guy in his face so hard that his parents probably died, and I peed a spot in my Levi's as well. He disappeared from sight with a quickness, and I collected myself and headed for the restroom to finish my piss.

    I got in there, and here was this poor bastard in tattered grave clothing, his rubber mask tipped back on his head, bleeding profusely from his nose and mouth down the sink, spitting blood bubbles and what appeared to be teeth, and crying...
    "Dude, what's wrong?" I inquired solicitously, though I knew damn well...
    "Suh muhdafugga hid be id by phuggigh dose!"
    "Man, that sucks, dude!" as I zip up and go to a sink where he can't see me rinsing his blood off of my sore knuckles..."Good luck!" and I scampered off to go sit somewhere other than where I'd been.

    If you see a guy in the fifth row, in the center seat, it would probably be a bad idea to even sit behind him, let alone make any actual noise. I actually wish I was kidding.





       

    I Didn't Write This...

    And it's long, but it says it all:

    LIBERALS and CONSERVATIVES:


    The division of the human family into its two distinct branches occurred some 10,000 years ago, a few hundred years after the flood. Humans coexisted as members of small bands of nomadic hunter/gatherers. In the pivotal event of societal evolution, beer was invented. This epochal innovation was both the foundation of modern civilization and the occasion of the great bifurcation of humanity into its two distinct subgroups: Liberals and Conservatives.

    Once beer was discovered, it required grain, and that was the beginning of agriculture. Neither the glass bottle or aluminum can had yet been invented, so it was necessary to stick pretty close to the brewery. That's how villages were formed.

    Some men spent their days killing animals to barbeque at night while they were drinking beer. This was the beginning of the conservative movement.

    Other men who were weaker and less skilled at hunting, learned how to live off conservatives by showing up for the BBQs every night and doing women's work like sewing, fetching and hair dressing. This was the beginning of the liberal movement. Later, some of the liberals actually became women.

    Liberal achievements include the domestication of cats, invention of group therapy and democratic voting to see how to divide the beer and meat that the conservatives provided. Women were not interested in democracy at that time because most of them were still women back then, and the conservatives fed them.

    Conservatives are symbolized by the largest, most powerful land animal on earth. Liberals are symbolized by the jackass.

    Modern Liberals like imported beer (they add lime), but most prefer white wine or foreign water in a bottle. They eat raw fish but like their beef well done. Sushi, tofu, and French food are on liberal menus. Their women have more testosterone than the men. Liberals like deviant sex and want others to like it too. Their first successful city governments were Sodom and Gomorrah.

    Most social workers, personal injury attorneys, journalists, and group Therapists are Liberals. Liberals invented the designated hitter rule in baseball because it wasn't "fair" to make the pitcher also bat.

    Conservatives drink domestic beer. They eat red meat, and still provide for their women. Conservatives are big-game hunters, rodeo cowboys, lumberjacks, construction workers, medical doctors, police officers, corporate executives, soldiers, athletes, and generally anyone who works productively outside government. Conservatives who own companies hire other conservatives who want to work for a living.

    Liberals do not produce anything. They like to "govern" the producers and decide what is to be done with the production. Liberals believe Europeans are more enlightened than Americans. That is why most of the liberals just stayed in Europe when conservatives were coming to America.

    Conservatives have principles; believe in a Creator, and the rule of law. They practice charity and give to the poor, normally through their churches. When in doubt on an issue, they check both the Bible and the Constitution, which they use as a constant reference in a changing world. They believe in the concept of truth.

    Liberals do not have principles, except for their dedication to stealing production of conservatives and undermining principled references such as the Bible and Constitution. They are never in doubt on an issue because they always do whatever is best for them without regard to others. They have no standard of reference. Liberals do not give to charity. They cultivate the poor like a cat cultivates a field of mice. They use the poor as voters and give them a portion of stolen tax money which they vote away from conservatives.

    Conservatives believe in self defense, both at home and abroad. They own guns and use them to discourage liberals and other common criminals. They provide guns to the armed forces to discourage foreign liberals and other foreign criminals.

    Liberals do not believe in conservative self defense. They disarm conservatives, and then attack them with impunity by liberal armies with guns. King George, Hitler and Stalin were all liberals who abandoned the rule of Law, had no principles except their own self indulgence, and attempted to tax and govern conservatives. Liberals believe in BIG government. They think the United Nations is the ultimate answer.

    Conservatives believe in the rule of law and when sitting on juries, convict common criminals and acquit fellow conservatives who have been charged by liberals. When serving in the armed forces, they shoot liberals from other countries who want to govern our country. Conservatives know the difference between a common-sense law and a bone-headed statute passed by some liberal from Massachusetts. When sitting on juries, they do not enforce bone-headed statutes, and don't explain their reasons.

    Liberals only believe in whatever laws are appealing to them, such as the privilege of making a living by taxing conservatives. When sitting on juries, liberals convict producers and acquit liberals and other common criminals. Modern Judges are all liberals as they do not produce anything except chaos, and are paid with confiscated tax money. They consider it against the law to reference any source of law such as the Bible or Constitution. Like other liberals, they just make it up as they go and do what is best for them. Judge Roy Bean is their model.

    The American cowboy, of course, is your basic, full-bore Conservative. A hundred years ago, an Englishman visiting Texas was attempting to find the owner of a huge cattle ranch. He rode up to one of the ranch hands, and inquired, "Pardon me, but could you perhaps tell me where I might locate
    your master?" To which the cowboy replied, "That sumbitch ain't been born yet".

    So, what'll it be? Wine or Beer? Domestic or Imported?

    [Disclaimer: This in no way is meant to disparage any beers from any of our good European allies]





       

    The Goddess Ann Speaks!

    Go and worship!

    My favorite quote:

    In a videotaped message, the al-Qaida "military commander" for Europe claimed credit for the bombings, saying that the terrorist attack was meant to punish Spain for supporting the war in Iraq. The message came as a total shock to liberals who have been furiously insisting that Iraq had absolutely nothing to do with al-Qaida.





        Wednesday, March 17, 2004

    An Important Distinction...

    When a Lib, or some other superior life form says you and/or your ideas are stupid, they say it from an attitude of contempt...an edict from on high. And then they proceed to hate you and hound you, as if you have some strange meaning to them.

    When a conservative, correct-thinking person says you are stupid, they dismiss you immediately and move on, because they know instinctively that your thoughts are defective, and have no worth other than cruel amusement at how stupid you are.

    Think about it...stupid.





       

    On Swearing...

    I believe it to be the musical accompaniment to speech. Even apes, taught to sign, swear.

    The same hypocrites that decry swearing, will turn around and praise Winston Churchill's eloquence, apparently ignorant of his place high up the pantheon of truly profane speakers.

    I think most people confuse Profanity with it's bastard cousin, Vulgarity. While there is a place for vulgarity, the use of Precision Guided Profanity is where the art form of combat adjectivism shines.

    For instance, I am hearing reports right now where journalists are describing a hotel in Baghdad as having been "blown up". How pedestrian. Much more effective had it been "blown all to fuck and gone", or even "blew the fucking dogshit out of it...", to combine both profanity and vulgarity in a savory stew of verbal spew.

    Am I worried that children may run across my screed? Fukkem. The internet ain't for kids, folks, no matter how Gore tried to handjob you on that.
    There's plenty of CD/DVD software out there for the little darlings to research and plagiarize to their hearts content in order to complete their milquetoast school projects.

    Women try to play like they don't swear. Hah. I'm too much of a gentleman to say anything more than hah! False gentlemanliness might help some of these prudish men (who decry swearing) forget that, at some point, their own mother was on her back, heels kicking in the air as she shreiked the F Word and cried out to her diety of choice.

    Swearing may not be for everybody. If you can barely cook, you should perhaps use caution with the seasoning. Folks who can hardly create a coherent sentence, should maybe get a good Websters before they invest in a Dictionary of American Slang.





       

    Just A Quick Thought...

    "One of theses things is not like the other..."

    A staple of Public Broadcasting. I know, because my kids watch PBS Kids nearly every day, which means I have to hear it, too.

    "One of theses things is not like the other, one of these things is not the same..."

    Isn't that teaching discrimination? Profiling?

    Just wondering...





        Tuesday, March 16, 2004

    Mister Language...

    Strikes again...

    This tickles me no end. I've been meaning to share a cute Nat (not Gnat, dammit) story for a couple of days, now, and this is the perfect spot.

    A few nights ago, my darling three year old, tired and all agrouch, was sitting on her potty ring on the toilet in the upstairs bathroom, panties around her ankles, screaming in frustration, besnotted and tearful. Sensing danger, I rushed in...Captain Daddy to the rescue!

    "What's wrong, Baby Girl?!"

    "I can NOT get this fucking booger.outta.my.nose!!"

    Trying to not let them see you laugh is sometimes the hardest part of parenting. And little pitchers DO have very big ears.

    Go find what you think is the most sheltered group of six year olds you can think of...heck, I'll even let you use Amish kids...observe them when they don't know you're there, and be amazed at the language you hear.





       

    More Porn...

    Scroll down for a picture of a hottie.





       

    Oh, Goody...

    I'm sure glad I don't live back east.





       

    Ha Ha! Told Ya So!

    I could have predicted this article.

    My favorite line:

    She added that blaming Jews, or anyone else, for killing Jesus is a non-issue because "He didn't stay dead." Perlman asked, "How can you be blamed for killing someone who is alive?"

    Persactly.





       

    It's About Time...

    I've been following this story for over a year, and it is nice to see that the Army is doing the right thing for this poor bastard.

    Sometimes the Good Guys win one.





       

    Horse Shit...

    I just heard a quick blurb on FOX News about horses being slaughtered in America for their meat, and that Bo Derek is 'coming up' to discuss the matter. I bet she's against it..."You won't believe who it's for!" the newshead promises breathlessly.

    Duh. France eats horses. Bick fucking deal. Bo, Baby, I love you dearly, but get off your 'high horse'...heh, get it? High Horse? Meat joke.

    There are only a teensy handful of creatures that I think it is wrong to eat, and I sincerely may ban you for teasing me about it. I mean it. I kicked the ass of one of my co-workers years ago because he was taking his big riding mower and chasing a group of bunnies around in a field we were mowing and turning them into chum...and then he found some box turtles...

    Yep, I pulled him off his mower and slapped the snot out of him, because I think those two creature subsets should be protected and nurtured, not killed and/or eaten. And I will fuck you up if I get half a chance for doing it. And that includes penguins, too. You can smash kittens with hammers all day and I won't say a word, but leave the turtles, bunnies, and penguins alone.

    All else is food. Don't test me, bitch.





       

    I'm Gonna Take A Chance...

    I'm going to watch the pilot of 'Century City' tonight on CBS at 9.

    Good news...it's Sci-Fi.

    Bad news...it's about lawyers...in the future.

    I would have hoped that in the future we would have found a way to safely exterminate lawyers. I studiously avoid any show that contains lawyers because they are such utter nonsense, and if it doesn't involve them getting spikes driven into their heads, or being torn apart by wild dogs, where's the entertainment?

    But, I'll give it a shot. Prognosis is not good.





       

    I Love This...

    An Open Letter to the People of Spain

    by Laura Mansfield, Analyst

    The terrorist attack that massacred 200 of your countrymen, and injured over a thousand, was a horrific act. The world grieves with you. We all know it could have happened to our people in our countries just as easily as it happened in Madrid last Thursday.

    But no matter how tragic and horrible that act was, it was not a victory for the terrorists.

    The victory for the terrorists in Spain came on Sunday.

    The professed goal of the attack, according to numerous Al Qaeda communiques, was to punish Spain for its support of the United States in the war against Iraq.

    Sunday, in your free elections, you voted to place the communist party in power. This morning your new leadership announced that it would withdraw the Spanish troops from Iraq, and in effect abandon the coalition.

    Your actions proved beyond the shadow of a doubt to Al Qaeda that if they kill enough people in a mass casualty attack that they can swing the popular vote. You've proved that they can influence elections.

    You have just guaranteed that the United States will sustain a mass casualty terrorist action on our soil before our November elections. After all, maybe we too can be frightened into a policy of isolationalism. You probably also doomed Tony Blair's government in England to the same fate. How many will die in terror attacks in the United States and England in order for the terrorists to try and intimidate us?

    In 1937, your countryman Pablo Picasso created a masterpiece depicting the horrors of wars in Guernica.

    That same year, British Prime Minister Neville Chamberlain made this statement: "We should seek by all means in our power to avoid war, by analyzing possible causes, by trying to remove them, by discussion in a spirit of collaboration and good will." He entered into a policy of appeasement with Germany, instead of taking a stand and drawing a line in the sands of time. The end result was that Adolf Hitler had more time to strengthen his hold on power and perpetrate a holocaust not just on the Jews of Germany, but on much of Europe.

    At the same time, your countrymen were giving their lives in a struggle for freedom in Spain.

    You were not afraid in 1937. Where is the courage of 1937?

    The message you sent to Al Qaeda yesterday was clear. "Please don't threaten us; please don't kill our people; we'll do what you want us to do."

    Why are you allowing the terrorists to intimidate you now? Why do you let them win?

    What happened?

    I leave you now with the words "Hasta la Vista". Call us when you need us. You will be calling; your actions in response to the Madrid terrorism attack guaranteed it. And when you call us, we will come and help. Even if Al Qaeda threatens us and attacks us. We don't let fear cower us into appeasement or surrender.
    That's the kind of people we are.


    From this website, another worthy of daily reading.





       

    Couldn't Have...

    ...said it better myself.

    This is a blog worthy of everyday reading.





        Monday, March 15, 2004

    This Is Just Sad...

    This guy's site has an interesting title...I like it.

    The photos are of the atrocity committed on the Serbs by Bill Clinton, his criminal gang, and Nato, featuring their pet zombie Wesley Clark. Our country has cooperated in some evil shit, but this may just be the most evil of them all. The Serbs, our noble allies during WWII, were destroyed by Bill Clinton to cover up his court troubles, and the Kosavars, Islamic fuckheads that manned the death camps for Hitler, were supported by Clinton.

    Rarely does my hatred burn as strong as when I think about this perfidy. What a terrible shame. The damage Clinton did to that area of the world and the Serbs is incalcuable. What surprises me is that the Serbs are not sending our boys home in body bags. Well, no surprise, actually...I said they were an honorable people.

    Now, the Kosavars are another story...terrorists, huge drug dealers (to fund terrorism), murderers. I just wish there had really been mass graves full of them. If I had the power, I would wipe them off the face of the earth.





       

    you suck, and that's sad
    you are the "you suck, and that's sad"
    happy bunny. you're truthful, but can be a bit
    brutal.


    which happy bunny are you?
    brought to you by Quizilla




       

    phoenix
    You are a PHOENIX in your soul and your
    wings make a statement. Huge and born of flame,
    they burn with light and power and rebirth.
    Ashes fall from your wingtips. You are an
    amazingly strong person. You survive, even
    flourish in adversity and hardship. A firm
    believer in the phrase, 'Whatever doesn't kill
    you only makes you stronger,' you rarely fear
    failure. You know that any mistake you make
    will teach you more about yourself and allow
    you to 'rise from the ashes' as a still greater
    being. Because of this, you rarely make the
    same mistake twice, and are not among the most
    forgiving people. You're extremely powerful and
    wise, and are capable of fierce pride, passion,
    and anger. Perhaps you're this way because you
    were forced to survive a rough childhood. Or
    maybe you just have a strong grasp on reality
    and know that life is tough and the world is
    cruel, and it takes strength and independence
    to survive it. And independence is your
    strongest point - you may care for others, and
    even depend on them...but when it comes right
    down to it, the only one you need is yourself.
    Thus you trust your own intuition, and rely on
    a mind almost as brilliant as the fire of your
    wings to guide you.You are eternal and because
    you have a strong sense of who and what you
    are, no one can control your heart or mind, or
    even really influence your thinking. A symbol
    of rebirth and renewal, you tend to be a very
    spiritual person with a serious mind - never
    acting immature and harboring a superior
    disgust of those who do. Likewise, humanity's
    stupidity and tendency to want others to solve
    their problems for them frustrates you
    endlessly. Though you can be stubborn,
    outspoken, and haughty, I admire you greatly.


    *~*~*Claim Your Wings - Pics and Long Answers*~*~*
    brought to you by Quizilla




       

    I Say, Bring Him Back...

    If Aristide wants back in Hatey so badly, I say pull out all of our troops and let him in.

    "Here ya go, buddy, you wanted it, you got it, but don't come crying to us again...ever."

    I'd give him about a week, and problem solved.





       

    If You're In A Good Mood,

    ...don't read this.





       

    Hmmmmm...

    This is interesting.

    The Money Quote:

    A need for the US European command to concentrate harder on north and west Africa may explain why the US Sixth Fleet is considering moving its main base from Gaeta, in Italy, to the southern Spanish port of Rota.

    Yeah, good luck with that...wonder how their latest election is going to effect this? Getting an American base in your country is a huge windfall for your economy...losing one is not good, either. Italy would sure like to keep us there, I bet.





       

    Hating Arabs...

    As if you needed another reason...

    Need more?





       

    Hang Em High...

    This guy needs to have his neck stretched.

    If you've read my stuff for any length of time, you know I am a staunch supporter of the all volunteer military. But, I have had misgivings about letting foreigners serve in our military, especially just for the mercenary reason of acquiring citizenship so they can grandfather the rest of their cockroach relatives into this country to leech off our system.

    This turd has solidified my misgivings into outright opposition. They need to strip his whore of a mother of her citizenship, and deport both of these shitstains back to Nicaragua as an example to the rest of the boll-weevils who infest our military.

    If any of you live in Florida, look up this pukes lawyer and put a couple in the back of his head for me, won't you?

    Thanks.





        Sunday, March 14, 2004

    This Just In!

    From Barb, and I hope this article has it right.

    If true, Israeli F-18's could be fueling up as we speak...I told you we sold them all those fighters for a reason.

    Hey, Syria? You can just pucker up, too. I've seen signs of CIA-type unrest occurring there for the last few days, too.





       

    Spain Fucks Itself...

    Not that I care one whit...they can all go hang as far as I care. Vote for a Socialist, and rot in Hell as far as I'm concerned.

    No, my concern is conflicted. I fear both that this will embolden Al Queerda to try this bombing nonsense here in America before our election, and I fear that they may not. Let me go on record yet again as saying that a terrorist act before the election guarantees Bush the next four years. But killing Americans is bad. Unless they are liberals, Greens, and Socialists. And hippies. I said I was conflicted.

    Anybody but Kerry, at any cost.





        Saturday, March 13, 2004

    Whew!

    I feel better, now...

    Sane white people don't do this...but people like this do it as second nature.

    Prove me wrong.




       

    Deep Throat...

    Have I mentioned that FOX News's Rita Cosby's voice sounds like she's got Toxic Shock Syndrome from an infected tampon?

    Or maybe a bad case of 'Dong Throat'? Probably from blowing half of Hamas? I mean the dead ones...

    Have I mentioned I hate this douche-gargler?





        Friday, March 12, 2004

    State Of The Blog...

    Comfortable. I'm happy with the way things are going. Comments haven't got out of hand, and/or turned into the bullshit chat room so many seem to.

    I do miss the emails. Oh, a few of the regulars send one now and then, but I miss the drive-by "Hey man, nice blog" emails by folks too shy to say the same thing in a 'public' comments forum. Sigh. I used to get 1-5 unique emails a day, sometimes as many as 20 if the subject was hot...no more. Ground to a halt.

    Oh well. Go back and read my archives, if you haven't...there's sure to be something to amuse, or more likely offend in there.

    I'm an Equal Opportunity Offender...





       




    You're The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy!

    by Douglas Adams

    Considered by many to be one of the funniest people around, you are
    quite an entertainer. You've also traveled to the far reaches of what you deem possible,
    often confused and unsure of yourself. Life continues to jostle you around like a marble,
    but it's shown you so much of the world that you don't care. Wacky adventures continue to
    lie ahead. Your favorite number is 42.



    Take the Book Quiz
    at the Blue Pyramid.





       

    Little Brown Jug...

    Drinking Update: Well, I made it five days, and then had two beers with some ribs Wednesday night. It was cool, though, cuz I forgot one of my beers, and had to re-cool it in the fridge when I found it. Habit's broken.

    I bought some nice Port, so I can have a civilized drink or two in the evening from a nice little glass, rather than the 14 ounce glass of burgundy (x3 or 4) that I had grown used to.

    I had a nice bottle of St. Pauli Girl last night while I watched CSI...a particularly gruesome episode, may I add.

    Alcohol is a sneaky demon, and one that requires constant vigilance. If you are a drinker, and you get lazy, it will eat your ass (and your liver) alive.





       

    Fun With Serial Killers...

    At 9pm tonight, on the USA Network. I think this show has promise, and I intend to tape it and watch it.

    I'm taping because tonight is 'Joan of Arcadia' night, and we never miss it. It is my wife and I's favorite show together. We intend to follow it at 9 with a new show called 'Wonderfalls' on FOX, which also shows great promise.

    I pity you fools who killed your television.





       

    Too Bad...

    ...this little fruit doesn't have a comments section. I would suggest that suicide is the sincerest form of self-criticism.

    Yeeesh.





       

    I Kinda Feel Bad...

    When I read an article like this, and then I find out the little girl was black, and I go "Whew!" and feel a sense of relief.

    Oh, piss off! Don't try to tell me that you don't flinch when you hear about a school bus getting hit by a train and everybody is killed, and then breathe a sigh of relief when you find out all of the passengers were illegal alien farm workers.

    It's just you and me, baby...you can be honest.

    On a semi-related note, I promise you that I will shoot through you to hit your Pit Bull if you bring one near my yard. The dogs in this happy story were Chows, another breed that I will kill with impunity...behind only the poodle statistically in emergency room treatments to children for dog bites.

    Fuck you and your pet fetish. I have had many dogs, but not any more. I tire of shooting them for fucking up. Dogs bite. It's what they do. They are, in fact, designed to bite. The don't chew, they gulp...they are designed to tear and gulp. Any dog too big to fit in a paper sack that would hold a six pack of beer is dangerous to your children...especially if it is not your dog. I grew up with a Doberman. She never bit me, but I watched her slice open a horse from the front of it's ear to the tip of it's nose like she'd used a scalpel, so quickly my eye couldn't follow it. The horse had snorted at me over a fence.

    I will shoot your dog, and shoot you, and there is no use whining about it. You brought a shit-machine into my yard...a loose, deadly weapon, and your behavior needs to be modified.

    Two Marines moved in across the street from me a month ago. They brought with them a Boston Terrier. They lived upstairs, and would let the dog run loose to take his shit. I told them that things would turn out tragically if one of my kids were so much as nipped. I like Marines, and I like Boston's, so I didn't shoot him or them right away. They moved downstairs to an apartment that has it's own back yard and the problem is solved. I am relieved.





       

    Lileks Is Awesome!

    Go read this...all of it, and quickly. His archiving system is squirrelly.

    This's why he gets the big bucks.





       

    Prostitution...

    On 20/20 tonight, Baba Wawa is going to be interviewing Kellie Carpenter, Rosie O'Donnel's paid squeeze.

    What? You actually think that spheroidal pervert could get nookie that hot if she didn't pay very well for it? Would you fuck her for free? I didn't think so. Oh, screw you, don't give me that crap about a 'sense of humor being attractive'...that might work if Rosie was funny, and not just a shrill harridan of a Lesbanian douche-bag.

    Eltona John is on the same show...is this some homo holiday I missed? I'm so outta touch.





       

    I Can't Believe Anybody Has The Guts...

    I found this article via Instapundit.

    They both better watch their asses...I've seen this go bad before.





       

    A Delightful Piece Of Propaganda...

    This article gave me great amusement. I can only wish what this piece of offal had been treated so. See if you can guess the ONE thing that I think is true in the whole article. And note how the Brit Press presents this, wide-eyed and gasping, as truth.

    All Liberals must be killed.





       

    A Most Surprising Conservative...

    Read the whole thing...age is an amazing transformer of attitude.





        Thursday, March 11, 2004

    Animal Lovers...

    To put it succinctly, a) I'd rather have people fucking animals than little kids, so, 'whatever port in the storm'...

    and b) If you can keep a baby cow in a cage to keep it tender, and then smash it's brains out and eat it, why can't you fuck it before, during, or after?

    Disclaimer: I love veal, but not 'in that way'...

    Update:

    In case you think I've slipped my traces, the above screed is a response to this article being bandied about blogdom today around the net.




       

    The Manchurian Candidate...

    If I only had one bullet left, and both John Fonda Kerry and John 'Fuck America' McCain lurched into my kill zone, I would probably have to use the bullet on myself in frustration. Hearing that McCain would consider running with Kerry has a certain terrible symmetry that clearly defines this political season.

    My above bullet scenario is the clinical definition of stress. Those two are like Hitler and Goebbels, Hannibal and 'The Tooth Fairy', Uday and Qusay. How can their Secret Service detail handle the stress of having a fully loaded firearm in their possession and Anti-Christs 1 & 2 within easy pistol shot? If I'm the guy with the trench coat and the MP5, there is going to be a tragic accident, and a black mark on my permanent record.
    BRRRRRRRRRTTTTTT!!!!! "Oh, excuse me!...Dammit!!...I am so sorry!!" Hopefully, I would be then punished by being assigned to Nancy Pelosi's detail, or Carol Mostly-Brown, or Chuck 'The Fuck' Schumer. No point in getting on Teddy Kennedy's detail, since elephant guns aren't standard Secret Service issue.

    Is it still legal in America to wish death to certain venereal disease cultures who are currently infesting the body politic? I mean, really, really, really wish? Really truly, fantasy jerkoff wish?

    My hatred of Jimmy Carter now seems as quaint and poignant as my childhood hatred of brussel sprouts, or of having to take a nap. I now understand and empathise with the DU Types hatred of President Bush, because of the utter contempt and hatred I hold for scrotal cheese drippings like Kerry and McCain, and other commie-symp puke-rrhoids from the boll-weevil Left.

    A political loss this time around is serious, not just trading one asshole for another, which has been the quo of our status since Eisenhower. No, this time, a loss to the Dark Forces of the Dhimmocrat Party would be the equivalent of watching your barricaded front door burst in under the weight of the hungry undead, and watching helplessly as they tear the flesh out of your children's throats with their dead black teeth.

    For all of Bush's manifest faults, a vote for anybody other than Bush (in fact, a straight Republican ticket vote except for RARE exceptions like Zell Miller) should, in a perfect world, earn you a knitting needle up your nose, stirred briskly around in your fore-brain.

    You weren't using it, anyway.





       

    The Goddess Ann Speaks...

    You know the drill...On Your Knees!





        Wednesday, March 10, 2004

    Star Trek Night Canceled!

    It's a fucking rerun, and one of those 'Western-Themed' episodes I hate so much, to boot.

    Watch 'Kingdom Hospital' at 10pm, instead. Oh, and catch the new animated show on UPN called 'Game Over: Meet The Smashburns'. It's a show about what video game characters do on their off time, and looks promising.

    Update:

    'The Smashburns' is the greatest animation I've seen since 'The Tick'. It is so good, it can't last, because of all the rest of you tasteless retards who watch 'American Idol' and fag shit like that.





        Tuesday, March 09, 2004

    MY New Truck...

    Me want this...bad!!





       

    How Many...

    Slant-eyed little faggots is this policy going to create?





       

    Honestly...

    I would kill this fucker if any of my family had been injured.

    And his wife.





       

    Must Read...

    If you are not reading Lileks every day, you are wrong.

    Go read today's...all of it...now.





       

    Drudge Can Fuck Up Your Day...

    And so can listening to the news with your morning coffee...or maybe I meant 'Spice Up Your Day'.

    I hollered downstairs just a bit ago: "Honey! They gave that nigger the death penalty!"..."Good!", she shouted back...how white people talk in private. We both knew who we were talking about, and were glad he is going to die. Too bad thay didn't decide to kill his little twink, too. Oh well, hopefully some big nazi fucks him to death in prison.

    And then this little gem greets me on Drudge...Hey! An opportunity to hate spics, too! Shaping up to be a great day already!

    And then the cherry on top, and I know life could hardly get any better. The only thing that would make life perfect is a video of those birdwatcher's faces while they watched.





        Monday, March 08, 2004

    Oh, By The Way...

    I told you God always blesses me...he dropped a few thousand bucks on me this afternoon, so I'll be around for another month.

    I quit drinking last Thursday because we could hardly afford milk, so the luxury habit had to go. I think I'll stay off the sauce for awhile, at least until I go see 'Dawn of the Dead' in a couple of weeks. I'll be sneaking a half pint o bourbon into that one, I'll tell ya.

    I have drank something every day for as long as I can remember. I quit for a year when I got out of the military because I had been drinking like a camel for too many years, and I wanted to see if I could stop.

    I haven't been twitchy, or seen any bugs crawling on me, but I definately have had a habit. I haven't had anything to drink for over three days, now, but the need to have a glass in my hand is still there...strictly muscle memory.

    Oh well, enough about me...what do you think about me?

    Heh...(bonus for the movie reference and who said it).







       

    This Is Bullshit!!

    This kind of article right here fully explains the continued pussification of America.

    Here's a quote:

    The survey found that 18.1 percent of respondents said they engaged in heavy drinking, defined as consuming at least five alcoholic drinks at one time at least once a week, compared to 15.4 percent in the 1998 study. It found that 19.4 percent of men in the military and 5.3 percent of women were classified as heavy drinkers.
    [Emphasis mine]

    If five drinks a week makes you a heavy drinker, and Michael Jordan is considered fat, who IS their ideal American, Woody Allen? Allan Alda?

    Fuck these assholes. It might not be such a big deal, but you just know the pussy officers in the military are being told that in order to get ahead, they've got to start putting the clamps to the troops and fuck them over for drinking. And they will do it, happily, because the officer corps is already rotten with political pussies.

    These kids, out in the world for the first time in their lives, working mostly boring, hugely difficult jobs, should be left alone. If ever there was a time in your life to get away with binge drinking, it's when your liver is fresh and young. The good news is, these kids are going to tell their chain of command to fuck off, and then do what they want...they have throughout history.

    The bad news is, some of these kids are gonna get busted, and embittered for life over a false premise.

    Cocksuckers.





        Sunday, March 07, 2004

    Ponder This...

    Gay and Lesbian Rights Groups are just the condom the devil stretches over his dick when he tries to stick it to the traditional family.





       

    Another Hollywood Idiot Off My List...

    Steve Martin speaks out.

    Oh well, he's nothing but a has-been anyway, who hasn't been remotely funny for years.

    Fukkim.





        Saturday, March 06, 2004

    Hari Kerry...

    This is funny...

    Pass it around.





       

    In Like A Lamb...

    Some twerp on another blog remarked on the banality of my blog. Dammit, I hate to say it, but he's right. Since the beginning of this month I've gone all warm and fuzzy. Ever since seeing 'The Passion', coupled with my current financial straits, and my current long-running cold, I am just 'phoning it in'.

    I haven't ripped anyone's balls off. I haven't molested anyone's inner child. I haven't kept any races down.

    I wish I could say I'm sorry, but fuck you, I ain't in the mood. By the end of this month, I will either not be blogging, or I will be going out like a lion. Or maybe with just a whimper. Who knows.

    There is no inspiration. Kerry, Martha Stewart, Howard Stern...they are the macaroni and cheese of Rant Topics. Boring boring boring.
    Those turds who got drowned today in the water taxi? Fukkem...shoulda took the bus...boring.

    TV? Reruns, mostly. Boring. My kids? No puke for days, well behaved, and boring. I was punching my daughter in the arm tonight to antagonize her into leaping on me like an enraged Rhesus monkey, and she turned it into a game. Boring.

    Do you think that this is when the guy got the idea to go up in the tower with a bag of rifles and ammunition? So frigging bored that popping college students began to sound like a good idea?

    Naah. That sounds boring, too. Now, if they wanted me to set up in a hide and pop beaners as they snuck across the border...naaah...just a pipe dream, anyway. I was behind my scope last night, using my range finder to target areas of cover in my neighborhood where an enemy might hide. Useful thing to know if the shit hits the fan. Just stay well back in a darkened room when you do it, cuz it freaks the neighbors out, let me tell ya.
    Man, that was boring, too.

    Come on Al Queda! Give us something to talk about! Naaah, those turds are going to wait for after the election, hoping to get that diseased butt-plug Kerry in over Bush.

    Fuck, I'm bored.





       

    You are 37% geek
    You are a geek liaison, which means you go both ways. You can hang out with normal people or you can hang out with geeks which means you often have geeks as friends and/or have a job where you have to mediate between geeks and normal people. This is an important role and one of which you should be proud. In fact, you can make a good deal of money as a translator.

    Normal: Tell our geek we need him to work this weekend.


    You [to Geek]: We need more than that, Scotty. You'll have to stay until you can squeeze more outta them engines!


    Geek [to You]: I'm givin' her all she's got, Captain, but we need more dilithium crystals!


    You [to Normal]: He wants to know if he gets overtime.

    Take the Polygeek Quiz at Thudfactor.com





        Friday, March 05, 2004

    Calling A Spade A Spade...

    Language is important. Please feel free to refer back to this whenever you hear yourself, or someone else use these words to smite someone.

    Bigot: big-ot n.

    One who is strongly partial to one's own group, religion, race, or politics and is intolerant of those who differ.
    ---------------------------------
    [French, from Old French.]
    Word History: Bigots may have more in common with God than one might think. Legend has it that Rollo, the first duke of Normandy, refused to kiss the foot of the French king Charles III, uttering the phrase bi got, his borrowing of the assumed Old English equivalent of our expression by God. Although this story is almost surely apocryphal, it is true that bigot was used by the French as a term of abuse for the Normans, but not in a religious sense. Later, however, the word, or very possibly a homonym, was used abusively in French for the Beguines, members of a Roman Catholic lay sisterhood. From the 15th century on Old French bigot meant ?an excessively devoted or hypocritical person.? Bigot is first recorded in English in 1598 with the sense a superstitious hypocrite.

    bigot

    \Big"ot\, n. [F. bigot a bigot or hypocrite, a name once given to the Normans in France. Of unknown origin; possibly akin to Sp. bigote a whisker; hombre de bigote a man of spirit and vigor; cf. It. s-bigottire to terrify, to appall. Wedgwood and others maintain that bigot is from the same source as Beguine, Beghard.] 1. A hypocrite; esp., a superstitious hypocrite. [Obs.]

    2. A person who regards his own faith and views in matters of religion as unquestionably right, and any belief or opinion opposed to or differing from them as unreasonable or wicked. In an extended sense, a person who is intolerant of opinions which conflict with his own, as in politics or morals; one obstinately and blindly devoted to his own church, party, belief, or opinion.

    bigot n. : a prejudiced person who is intolerant of any opinions differing from his own

    bigotry \Big"ot*ry\, n. [Cf. F. bigoterie.] 1. The state of mind of a bigot; obstinate and unreasoning attachment of one's own belief and opinions, with narrow-minded intolerance of beliefs opposed to them.

    2. The practice or tenets of a bigot.

    rac-ism n.
    1. The belief that race accounts for differences in human character or ability and that a particular race is superior to others.
    2. Discrimination or prejudice based on race.

    racist adj
    1: based on racial intolerance; "racist remarks"
    2: discriminatory especially on the basis of race or religion
    [syn: antiblack, anti-Semitic, anti-Semite(a)] n : a person with a prejudiced belief that one race is superior to others [syn: racialist]

    ho-mo-pho-bi-a n.
    1. Fear of or contempt for lesbians and gay men.
    2. Behavior based on such a feeling.
    --------------------------------------
    [homo(sexual) + -phobia.]
    --------------------------------------
    homo-phobe n.
    homo-phobic adj.

    realist n.
    1. One who is inclined to literal truth and pragmatism.
    2. A practitioner of artistic or philosophic realism.

    realist n
    1: a philosopher who believes that universals are real and exist independently of anyone thinking of them 2: a painter who represents the world realistically and not in an idealized or romantic style

    hate

    \Hate\, v. t. [imp. & p. p. Hated; p. pr. & pr. & vb. n. Hating.]
    1. To have a great aversion to, with a strong desire that evil should befall the person toward whom the feeling is directed; to dislike intensely; to detest; as, to hate one's enemies; to hate hypocrisy.

    Whosoever hateth his brother is a murderer. --1 John iii. 15.

    2. To be very unwilling; followed by an infinitive, or a substantive clause with that; as, to hate to get into debt; to hate that anything should be wasted.

    I hate that he should linger here. --Tennyson.

    3. (Script.) To love less, relatively. --Luke xiv. 26.

    Syn: To Hate, Abhor, Detest, Abominate, Loathe.

    Usage: Hate is the generic word, and implies that one is inflamed with extreme dislike. We abhor what is deeply repugnant to our sensibilities or feelings. We detest what contradicts so utterly our principles and moral sentiments that we feel bound to lift up our voice against it. What we abominate does equal violence to our moral and religious sentiments. What we loathe is offensive to our own nature, and excites unmingled disgust. Our Savior is said to have hated the deeds of the Nicolaitanes; his language shows that he loathed the lukewarmness of the Laodiceans; he detested the hypocrisy of the scribes and Pharisees; he abhorred the suggestions of the tempter in the wilderness.

    hate

    n : the emotion of hate; a feeling of dislike so strong that it demands action [syn: hatred] [ant: love] v : dislike intensely; feel antipathy or aversion towards; "I hate Mexican food"; "She detests politicians" [syn: detest] [ant: love]

    discriminate v. discriminated, discriminating, discriminates
    v. intr.

    1. To make a clear distinction; distinguish: discriminate among the options available.
    2. To make sensible decisions; judge wisely.
    3. To make distinctions on the basis of class or category without regard to individual merit; show preference or prejudice: was accused of discriminating against women; discriminated in favor of his cronies.

    v. tr.
    1. To perceive the distinguishing features of; recognize as distinct: discriminate right from wrong.
    2. To distinguish by noting differences; differentiate: unable to discriminate colors.
    3. To make or constitute a distinction in or between: methods that discriminate science from pseudoscience.

    discriminate

    adj 1: marked by the ability to see or make fine distinctions; "discriminate judgments"; "discriminate people" [syn: discriminating] [ant: indiscriminate] 2: noting distinctions with nicety; "a discriminating interior designer"; "a nice sense of color"; "a nice point in the argument" [syn: nice] v 1: recognize or perceive the difference [syn: know apart] 2: treat differently on the basis of sex or race [syn: separate, single out] 3: distinguish; "I could not discriminate the different tastes in this complicated dish"

    Sticks and stones, baby...sticks and stones...





       

    Vox Is At It Again...

    I can hardly bear to fisk this.

    Actually, I don't want to. He is, possibly, smarter than me, and certainly much wordier. I tend to solve problems by paring them down like a math problem, where you end up with something like 'Communism=Evil'. And I never liked to show my work when I could solve a problem in my head.

    Suffice to say, he thinks we are not at war, and I think we are. He and I have seen the same evidence, we have a pretty much equal assessment of George Bush (whom he refers to as George Delano, a baser and more vile insult than any I could append,) and yet we are at complete opposite ends of the spectrum over this issue. He even takes a fairly inexpensive shot at Lileks, a writer I enjoy and admire.

    Sigh. My head is full of over the counter drugs, and snot, but let me tackle this and then go collapse into my sick bed.

    I note his use of the phrase 'Police Action'....ahhhh. That little dust-up in Korea wasn't a war, even though we fought it for years, and continue to 'garrison' the DMZ to this day. Viet Nam. Not a war.

    Semantics. Tell it to the families of our honored dead.

    Cold War? A journalistic buzz-word that caught on. Lasted decades, as I recall. I don't think it's over, either. One stupid wall falling does not the surrender of the Red Menace make. The Great Wall in China is falling apart, but no one in their right mind would posit the demise of China from the decay of it's wall.

    Vox seems upset that there was no declaration. Kinda sounds like the folks that complained that the Colonists weren't playing fair because they hid behind trees when they shot British soldiers. We are in a new paradigm, where war and diplomacy can, for the first time in history, work together intimately, and with immediacy.

    He really ticks me off with this statement, though:

    "...There's no reason to believe Kerry is less likely to fight a necessary war than Bush..."

    Bullshit. "By their words you shall know them...", and we have no reason to disbelieve Kerry when he says he will go to the UN for his war-fighting needs...

    And this parting shot:

    "...As for me, I'm not considering not voting for George Delano, I'm absolutely not voting for him..."

    I'm stunned. I didn't see Vox as a Kerry voter. A vote against Bush, or a vote withheld, is a vote for Kerry.

    Bush is all we've got, and whether I like it or not, it's that simple. Kerry is a bad man who would make a terrible President, a President who would make us long for the halcyon days of the Pharaoh Clinton's rule.

    It's just that simple.

    Update:

    Lileks stands up...




        Thursday, March 04, 2004

    Kingdom Hospital...

    I am watching it right now. I taped the two hour premiere last night. If you didn't watch it, or don't have it on tape, I feel sorry for you.

    It is a true work of art...so good I could practically swoon.

    I can't wait til next weeks show.





       

    For What It's Worth...


    Which Survivor of the Impending Nuclear Apocalypse Are You?
    A Rum and Monkey joint.

    It's not unusual to survive my, my, myyyyyy apocalypse, because you're everybody's favourite Welshman,

    Tom Jones!
    Forged from molten steel beneath the Earth's crust seven hundred million years ago, you are like a great big hairy Welsh crooner of iron. Which is just a well, because it's all-out death time! And great big steel fighting machines tend to survive that kind of thing.

    It's good to know your music will live on. Truly, it is.



    I think I post these because, otherwise, I don't know how to post photos, and I'm too lazy to learn, even though I've got tons of time on my hands.





       

    It Never Fails To Startle Me...

    ...when I am reading and enjoying another's blog, and find a reference to me.

    I don't have a blogroll, but if I did, this one would be on it. Go read this post, which I found linked via Insapundit.

    The snake swallows it's tail...





       

    Star Whores...

    The same evil bastards and bastardettes that ask why a person needs a gun to defend themselves, will try to tell you we shouldn't militarize space.

    Like Nathan Bedford Forrest said, "He who gets thar fustest with tha mostest, wins" and that is what we should be doing.

    The militarization of space is inevitable, and we need to hold the high ground. And that would be the moon. The Chinks are already headed there, as are our dear friends the Japs. And who knows who else. I don't think we should share, either, and if that means world war, tough titty. That is inevitable, too.

    I hope the people who plan these things are doing their job right, and not fucking around on the golf course.





       

    The Gold Standard...

    I hear all kinds of chatter about buying gold, investing in gold, and all of that nonsense.

    Silver. Diamonds. Platinum. What are you going to do if you have a pile of one thing, and the Powers That Be change the standard to another thing?

    Don't laugh, it's happened before...with silver. And anyone who knows anything knows that the price/value of diamonds is kept grossly inflated by the De Beers diamond empire. Now that science can make diamonds that are superior to 'natural' diamonds, I sure would hate for all of my net worth to be tied up in pretty rocks.

    Money has value only as long as the Powers say it does. I have a collection of bills that once had great value, but now are just quaint bits of paper. Some have Saddam's picture on them.

    I guess I'm obsessing on the money issue because I do not, currently, have any. I can't remember a time when we've been this broke at our house. If the placeholders we currently use to delineate wealth were to lose their value tomorrow, what would be considered wealth?

    Assuming that societal collapse would no doubt follow such an event, I would guess that items like bullets, cigarettes, coffee, and alcohol would become coin of the realm. I would be rich, because I've got lots of bullets.

    But for today...in the real world, I am broke, and without prospects.

    Now there's a test of faith.





        Wednesday, March 03, 2004

    Lest We Forget!

    It is STAR TREK night!!

    Be there!





       

    The Goddess Ann Coulter Speaks!

    Go forth, and worship.

    I take only the teensyist ittyist bittyist issue with her on the subject of God's race...

    Christ, while Jewish in His earthly form, was changed so that His own Mother didn't recognize Him when He returned.





       

    Dipshits Come In...

    All flavors...





       

    What Can I Say?

    El Dorado Hills man arrested on child pornography charges
    The Associated Press
    SACRAMENTO (AP) - An El Dorado Hills man is being held without bond on federal child pornography charges after agents on Monday said they seized images from his home showing him performing sexual acts with a 2-month-old girl.
    U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement agents said the girl is one of the youngest sexual assault victims they have ever encountered.

    Larry Michael Jeffs, 41, was arrested at his home Thursday after the agents said they found explicit video images showing him engaging in sexual acts with the infant, who is now 8 months old.

    Jeffs is alleged to have distributed the images over the Internet, where they were recovered during a child pornography investigation in Detroit. The agents said they traced the images to Jeffs' e-mail.

    Federal agents and the agents with the California Department of Justice Sexual Predator Apprehension Team raided Jeffs' home and seized computer equipment, a digital camera, and infant's clothing and bedding.

    Jeffs remains in the Sacramento County Jail, charged with producing and distributing child pornography, which carry a maximum prison term of 50 years.

    The continuing Detroit investigation is part of the government's Operation Predator, which targets child sexual predators worldwide, including subscribers to Internet child pornography Web sites. Since it began in July, the sweep has brought more than 2,000 arrests nationwide.


    The sad part is that, even as you read this paragraph, some sick bastard is doing it right this second to another innocent.

    Tell me again why we don't kill these animals?





       

    I Don't Like Acidman...

    That being said, go read this and tell me it didn't take huge balls for him to say it. I am proud of him for it, and have gained a sort of grudging respect for him.

    He is catching hell all over the blogosphere for saying what he believes, including this pussy, who I used to enjoy. Aaron says what HE wants to and posts cruel, violent pictures all the time, and yet Acidman's legitimate rant gets him delinked?

    Hypocrisy, and I spit on it. I do not use the word 'nigger' by choice, for it is not in me to, in public, anyway. But, were I to get a bellyfull, like Acidman obviously did, I would feel free to rant away with whatever language I wanted to use, and the critics be damned.

    At least, I hope so.

    Update:

    A whole lotta pussies are crying over Acidman's 'nigger' post. I went to Oliver Willis's blog and saw a black man who had to write 'a**hole' to describe someone who had obviously pissed him off, and he could only refer to the Bad Word as 'n****r'...what a pussy.

    If I ever appear to give a shit about some pussy delinking me, shoot me, because I will most assuredly have been taken over by aliens.

    If any of you bloggers piss me off, I may tell you, or I may just quit reading your shit, but I sure hope I don't look like a pussy over it.





       

    You Won't Believe This...

    Is what Blackfive suggests...and you'd better have taken your blood pressure meds.




       

    This Makes Me Sick(er Than Usual)...

    Go read this article. Read all of it. And weep.

    By the way, the traces of uranium they mention finding in the Iranian centrifuges have since been determined to be of Russian origin.

    Thanks a lot, Allah.

    I mean it, it's a long article, but read it all. And then email it around. The future scenario I see that makes sense is a limited nuclear strike by India on Pakistan, in cooperation with the US, while Israel nukes the Iranian facilities and Tehran.

    Two money quotes from the article:

    Another nonproliferation official depicted the challenge facing the I.A.E.A. inspection regime as “a seismic shift—the globalization of the nuclear world.” The official said, “We have to move from inspecting declared sites to ‘Where does this shit come from?’ If we stay focussed on the declared, we miss the nuclear supply matrix.” At this point, the international official asked me, in all seriousness, “Why hasn’t A. Q. Khan been taken out by Israel or the United States?”
    [emphasis mine]

    and

    Robert Gallucci, a former United Nations weapons inspector who is now dean of the Georgetown University School of Foreign Service, calls A. Q. Khan “the Johnny Appleseed” of the nuclear-arms race. Gallucci, who is a consultant to the C.I.A. on proliferation issues, told me, “Bad as it is with Iran, North Korea, and Libya having nuclear-weapons material, the worst part is that they could transfer it to a non-state group. That’s the biggest concern, and the scariest thing about all this—that Pakistan could work with the worst terrorist groups on earth to build nuclear weapons. There’s nothing more important than stopping terrorist groups from getting nuclear weapons. The most dangerous country for the United States now is Pakistan, and second is Iran.” Gallucci went on, “We haven’t been this vulnerable since the British burned Washington in 1814.”
    [emphasis still mine]





       

    The Death Of The Theory Of Evolution...

    This scalp belongs on Fred Reed's lodgepole.

    Could I ever write this well? I don't think so.





        Tuesday, March 02, 2004

    Al Qaeda Plans 'Revisit' To White House, Capitol...

    Good...they need a visit...





       

    Cliffhanger...

    I will be voting against Gordon Smith here in Oregon until he is defeated because of this vile shit he voted for today.

    It failed, magically, but it roils, just under the surface, and needs badly to be harpooned.





       

    Suicide...

    Is the sincerest form of self criticism...





       

    Don't Make Me...

    Get all Biblical on yo ass!





       

    Fuck McDonalds...

    I have never once, ever asked a McDrone to Supersize a meal of mine...

    But just the thought that I could, made me feel more like an American, and now those bitches are taking it away.

    Ronald, you psycho-looking bitch clown, don't try to lie to me and tell me you are doing it "for my own good", you heartless, painted harlot of a corporate shill. You and I both know, clown-boy, that some gaggle of Harvard MBA's told you and the shriveled Mrs. Kroc that you were losing your asses on this promotion and you needed to find some graceful way out.

    So you pandered.

    Fuckers.







       

    Saw The Passion Today...

    Everything I wanted to say I said here, and I agree with Lee and many posters there.

    Lotsa spoilers, so go see the movie first before you read this or any other threads.

    For the lazy:

    I come here fresh from the theatre, and I wanted to read your take, Lee, before I went and blogged my own. I haven't read any of the comments above, yet.

    I was so psyched out for '28 Days Later' that it was a letdown when I finally saw it. Same with 'The Passion'. Oh, don't get me wrong, I used a whole kleenex, but left the other 10 in my pocket unused. The violence didn't bother me a bit, other than to help me empathise with His suffering, which it did quite well. I was actually disappointed. The Bible says they ripped the beard from His face, and that he was left unrecognizable as a human being. And I'll bet you He didn't have a tooth left in His head. I actually wish it had risen to that level, which I had already seen in my head before I went there.

    A truly beautiful, well-made film, the most moving I've ever seen. I will go see it again to enjoy the craftsmanship, and worship Him again, and to thank Him.


    Go read the comments at Lee's...but go see the movie first!





        Monday, March 01, 2004

    T2, Revelations...

    It ruined it for me, and now I'm going to ruin it for you...

    Change channels quick, unless you want me to fuck it up for you forever!

    Still here? Okay...'member all the effort they went through to destroy the chip and the arm, and finally the new and improved warm and fuzzy Terminator who doesn't kill but only cripples with knee-capping and thigh-bone shots with a .45?

    Yeah? Eh? Following me?

    Okay...


    ...what happened to the robot arm that the Terminator ripped off of himself after the T-1000 gacked him into that big machine? Eh? Eh?

    Thought so!
    And let's not even go there about how they dumped the T-1000 into a huge vat of molten metal where HE'D FEEL RIGHT AT HOME!!!

    The hot metal that spilled out onto the floor REVIVED him after his unfortunate episode with the liquid nitrogen from the truck, and now you're gonna try to tell me that his essence hasn't contaminated and spread through that entire vat of fresh, hot steel?

    Pish posh.





       

    A Public Service Announcement...

    Kids aren't born to hate...

    Kids learn it from you...

    Be sure to teach them well...

    ...and who




       

    Best Movies, Ever...

    Over at Right Thinking, they are nattering on about their choices for best movies ever.

    Well, the BEST movie is easy, Night of the Comet... and I will now present my list in no particular order:

    Anything by Ridley Scott; 'Blade Runner', 'Alien', 'Legend', etc.

    Almost anything by Luc Besson, especially 'The Fifth Element'.

    'LOTR 1-3' and anything else from Peter Jackson, except 'Dead Alive', which showed promise, but which was both stupid and annoying.

    'Nosferatu', both old and new. Seminal vampire flick.

    'The Usual Suspects', and just about anything with Kevin Spacey in it, but not 'Seven', which I hated on so many levels that I want to knife people in the video store whom I see handling the box.

    'The Crow', and anything with Brandon Lee in it. I miss him. Oh, and anything with Dolph Lundgren in it, especially 'I Come In Peace', also one of my favorite movies ever, and where I first learned to hate Brian Benben.

    'Gladiator', and anything with Russell Crowe in it.

    'A Boy and His Dog', perhaps my second favorite movie, and Don Johnson also wowed me in 'Dead Bang', which contains the second best puke scene ever after 'Brewster Mcloud', which had the best puke scene ever and is a movie everybody should see at least once...and in the weird movie department, that includes 'Steelyard Blues' and 'Morgan'...oldies but goodies, if you can still find them.

    'Rollerball'...the one with James Caan, and while we're talking about James Caan, anything with James Caan in it, especially 'The Killer Elite', which brings us to my Favorite Director:

    Sam Peckinpah, unless it is in any movie with Warren Oates as the lead male actor. I worship Sam Peckinpah with a fierceness, and I believe he spawned my second favorite director of all time:

    Paul Verhoeven, whose masterpiece 'Robocop' is only matched by the equally great 'Starship Troopers'. His 'Flesh & Blood' may be my third or fourth favorite movie, ever.

    'Akira' for best animated film sans CGI, with just about any Japanime vampire stuff a close second.

    'Red Dawn', by the almost always superb John Milius.

    'Reservoir Dogs', and anything else Tarantino The Great puts his hand to, except for 'Dusk To Dawn', which I hated.

    'The Good, The Bad and the Ugly', and anything else Clint Eastwood has appeared in or directed up to 'Mystic River', which I will never ever pollute my eyes with.

    I mostly can't stand war movies. They tend to be fake, from the gasoline intensive explosions, to the fake gung ho bullshit.
    A notable exception is 'Kelly's Heroes', on my list as the best war movie, ever. Ever. Shut the fuck up, I said ever. Followed closely by 'Cross of Iron'. Any war movie has to meet or exceed those two's standards to make it on my list.

    Then, 'Catch-22', 'A Bridge Too Far', 'The Longest Day', 'Saving Private Ryan', 'Band of Brothers', and 'Tobruk', even though it was fag-infested. I didn't know it at the time, so it makes the list.

    I wouldn't wipe my ass with 'Patton', so don't even try it.

    I loved 'Funny Girl' and 'Pretty Woman'...I don't care! Shut up!

    Stanley Kubrick gets a (tepid) honorable mention for '2001' (in my top 20) and 'A Clockwork Orange', which I still enjoy ever so often. How he got such kudos for such a small body of rather mediocre work I'll never understand. I did enjoy 'Dr Strangelove', but 'The Shining' was truly amateurish and awful. I liked the made for TV version far better, and that's saying something. 'Full Metal Jacket'? Meh, okay, but not on my list of favorites by any means.

    I could make a whole nother list of my favorite Sci-Fi and Horror movies, which tends to be what I gravitate towards. I am highly anticipating the coming 'Van Helsing' flic...hope it doesn't piss me off.